Issue # 13

we almost bought a crib

When Saad and I took a baby class near the end of my pregnancy, we ended up in a group of 10 couples. That group became our unofficial cohort; a bunch of new parents all stumbling through the same season at the same time. It’s been nice. We get together about once a month, share stories, swap updates, laugh about the chaos. We have a group chat where we share things too.

Over time, it’s also shown me how many different ways there are to raise a kid.

We’ve made a few decisions that looked different from the group. I had a water birth, without an epidural; something no one else in the class did. We cosleep. We skipped the crib entirely and transitioned straight to a floor bed when our son outgrew his bassinet.

But here’s the funny thing: some things we thought we were doing “differently” turned out not to be so different at all. Turns out, a few others were quietly cosleeping too. Everyone’s just figuring it out, in their own way.

That’s what this season has taught me over and over: different doesn’t mean wrong. And just because a choice feels uncommon doesn’t mean it’s unsafe, or even rare.

When it came time to move our son out of the bassinet, we knew we wanted to try a floor bed. He was over 20 pounds, well past the bassinet’s limit, and we felt like we’d all sleep better with more space and his own room.

But no one else around us was doing a floor bed. We second-guessed ourselves. Should we get a crib just in case? Were we missing something obvious?

We read more. We thought more. And then we decided: let’s just try it. We didn’t do a fancy Montessori setup, we just bought a mattress. If it didn’t work, we could always pivot.

Turns out, it did work. Our son sleeps pretty well in his room now. And I’m grateful we trusted ourselves.

There’s so much advice out there. So many ads. So many rules and warnings and what-to-expects. It’s easy to feel like doing something different must mean doing something wrong.

But if it’s safe, thoughtful, and working for your family, it’s okay to be the outlier. You might be surprised by how many others are doing it their own way too, just quietly.

Doing what I'm doing,

Aurooba

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